Pastoring Partners has been serving as an encouragement to women all over the world in the ministry since 1998. The goal of this ministry is to provide a place of information, validation, affirmation and support to those who are functioning as partners in the work of the ministry, whether they be women pastors, or pastor’s wives serving in church ministry.
According to statistics, there are now over 400,000 pastor's wives in the United States alone. (Source: Partnership Magazine.) According to a survey done by author Ruthe White, (Source: What Every Pastor's Wife Should Know, by Ruthe White) a large percentage of pastor's wives indicated in her survey that they had no ministry role model with whom they could identify. White says, "We are often confused, frustrated about our roles, and can find almost no help in ascertaining what is expected of us. Material geared to our needs is often limited and we have to search to find what does exist." While I have found this to be somewhat true regarding the pastor's wife in general, I have found it to be extremely true for those of us in partnership ministry, or those serving as women pastors.
In addition to being a pastor's wife, I co-pastor alongside my husband as well. I have searched for the past twenty years for ANY information that would be helpful to me in this calling I fulfill. For most of the years I have been in ministry, there has been virtually none and I have learned by the hard knocks of experience. I searched high and low for information about partnership ministry or co-pastoring and kept waiting for somebody else to write a book on it or start a ministry. Along the journey of asking others I felt were "qualified" to do a ministry such as this, many of those people said, "are you sure you're not meant to do this?" Confirmation after confirmation came that let me know it was God's desire for me to provide for others what I was so desperately searching for. The rest is history and it's been an amazing 10 year journey of connecting with others!
Being a woman pastor or pastor's wife can be extremely isolating. You can find several books, magazines and resources for pastor's wives and ministry families as a whole. However, the articles that I read and tapes that I listen to (and most conferences that I go to) are very "general" and directed to a broad ministry audience. Most material I get my hands on regarding pastor’s wives is more for those in a behind the scenes role than those in major leadership roles. And, some denominations do not have resources for women in ministry simply because they don't believe in such. So, as we begin to walk in this calling, we often feel like we are in a "wilderness" as far as information, validation and support. That is why I felt a call to start this ministry, to particularly encourage those who are stepping out into church leadership, or have been there for a while and need a resource just like I do.
Pastoring Partners ministry reaches out and includes women in ministry from all backgrounds and denominations, and of course those who may not be with any particular fellowship. But just to share with you about my background personally, I happen to be part of a fellowship that welcomes women in ministry. I am credentialed with the Assemblies of God. Women in leadership have been a big part of our fellowship from the very beginning, praise God! Many served as senior pastors, in fact… in the early days of the Assemblies, one in four credential holders was a woman. Six out of twelve people who served on the first credentialing board of the Assemblies of God were women. In the beginnings of our fellowship, women also planted churches with their husbands, and the partnership model of ministry was in full bloom. There was no "label" or "title" to it, but believe me, that's exactly what these couples functioned as...co-pastors.
Over the years, this became less popular. Why? After World II, everything changed. When the men went to war, this necessitated women taking jobs outside the home. This changed American life, and also church life as we know it. Women had more choices, and many took jobs outside of the home and the church. As the years went on, most pastor's wives chose to work outside the home. They ceased to devote their energies (aside from that of caring for their family) to the church as they did previously. There are many other reasons that this whole change came about, but the important thing to note is, things changed at that time. For a long time we did not see partnership ministry as much, but since the 1940’s the winds of change are blowing in a different direction again and we see women have more choices and are taking advantage of them. Not just in the fellowship I serve in, but in all different groups, we see more women coming to the forefront in ministry.
It was recently reported in a ministerial conference that I attended that the fastest growing churches at this time are independent churches. Churches are being started all over the country by husband/wife teams and they are flourishing. I believe this is because people feel safe with a spiritual father and mother of the church. The church body, no matter how large, is a "family." We are a body, the family of Christ. I believe people appreciate having a spiritual mother and father leading a body of believers, and this is one reason why these churches grow.
There are many high profile role models partnership ministry that we can find… thousands are all over Christian television and magazines. But what about the local church? How about mentors that you can actually pick up the phone and "talk to"? Who can you talk to, up close and personal? This is where we find the biggest lack of resource.
There are women who feel the call to be a woman pastor, staff pastor, or pastor's wife who is involved in ministry leadership. They long to venture out into this type of ministry full time. But, they sense resistance. The resistance can be from many sources.
Some women express that their husband is afraid of this, or not ready for it. Since I have started doing this ministry, there have been countless women who have e-mailed or called me and said, "I'm ready, but my husband isn't! This is just too different for him. I feel called, but I don't feel I can act on the call." Please know that this is really common. If your husband does not see this partnership model with many of his peers, or it does not seem to be supported by those in ministry who surround him, it can be difficult for him to go against the flow so to speak. Don't fight against your husband. Give him time, and watch change happen through prayer. God will give you a beautiful ministry together in His time.
Many also sense resistance from other people, or perhaps even resistance from within! Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy… we talk ourselves into thinking we can't do it. I know of many women whose husbands and churches are just waiting for them to rise to their call, however their own fear prevents them from doing so. Again, the goal of this site is to encourage you to stir up the gifts within you, encourage and empower you.
I want to point out that I did begin Pastoring Partners because I believed I had all the answers. I don't. I am merely a fellow traveler on this ministry journey. But I desire to encourage and affirm you in this calling. I also desire to link arms with you, and get ideas from YOU! Since starting this website and message board years ago, we have also founded the Unstoppable Conference, which happens once a year here in Tampa Bay. Here women can meet the women in ministry they have been encouraged by here on the site. We also have a great time of worship, teaching, powerful prayer times, and fellowship together. To get more information on Unstoppable, click here.
When I find a woman who is very involved in ministry, I notice that we are like instant magnets, drawn to one another. We speak the same language. We like to "talk shop" and find great encouragement and fulfillment in this. I have connected with lots of women all over the world who have been a part of Pastoring Partners since the beginning, and we have forged relationships that will last a lifetime. We have all learned so much from each other.
It is my prayer as you read the updates on Pastoring Partners, and you visit the message board (and hopefully come to Unstoppable!) you will be encouraged by myself and other women all over the world, who will remind you that through the power of the Holy Spirit…YOU CAN DO THIS!
One of the main goals of this ministry is to serve as a “safe place” for women in ministry. We all have the Lord but sometimes, you just need a sister to come alongside you and lift you up. It is also my deep desire to have this site be a place of encouragement for women who are not highly involved at this time, but desire to be. Perhaps you have not stepped out into this role, yet you are called. Maybe you have been afraid? Nervous? Clueless? Hey, been there, done that, bought the t-shirt. We're here to help you. Just register on the message board and you'll have instant help from our resident partners...those who are in the trenches and will be glad to help you however they can.
Please contact me at pastordeanna@pastoringpartners.com with any comments, questions or suggestions. I would love to hear from you. If you know of any other resources that we can add to this site for others to check out, please let us know. After all, we are not in competition! We are on the same team. Let's make a connection!
Much love,
Deanna
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